The "BIG" appointment

Hi Friends!
Thank you so much for all of your support and follow up as I know you all are curious how my appointments with my treatment team went on 11/21.......

I met with my nurse navigator, surgeon, oncologist, & radiology oncologist and I have to say that I have some of the BEST doctors taking care of me!! Incredible knowledge, great bedside manner, and I feel confident in my decision that I have made for my journey. 

I have decided to move forward with a mastectomy on my right side with reconstruction. This will take place on Tuesday, 12/19/17. I will be in the hospital for at least one night and then home resting from this major surgery for up to 8 weeks. I won't be able to do much during this time, which will be hard for me. But I have to realize that I need to learn how to relax and take care of myself! Then will be the grueling, scary, and long part of my journey as I will have chemotherapy for 4-5 months..... 8 sessions every 2 weeks. The first 2 sessions will be 1 dose of chemo and the 3-8 sessions will be a double dose. I realize this is going to make me extremely sick and weak, but I know this is the aggressive route needed to get rid of this awful disease in my body. I am ready to live another 50 years!! Good bye early onset Breast Cancer!!

There are still several tests that will confirm this is my route of treatment, but I am about 90% sure, this is where I will end. I have to get a heart scan to make sure my heart is strong enough for the chemo, MRI to confirm markers of cancer (testing both sides), & waiting for my genetics testing to come back. I will then meet with my plastic surgeon to review reconstruction and implants (D might be happy about this one!! LOL) :)

But I can still tell you all of this is still super raw..... Most mornings I wake up hoping this is all a horrible nightmare, but also realizing that this is all the truth, and I am ready to be a pink warrior. I am terrified to look at myself without hair, I am terrified to add additional scares to by body....but I look forward to kicking cancer's ass, coming out of this stronger than before, and being the biggest advocate there is! This is my journey and I want to help others when I am done. I will conquer & succeed!! 

I have been running again which is very freeing for me. It gives me personal time to process, cry, sing, relieves so much angry, and is very rewarding. There have already been several emotional days and I am sure there will be others. I cry, I scream, I pray, and I just run quietly, and all of this has helped me heal.

Many of you have reached out with resources, people that you know have been through this journey, & what my family needs. I can't say it enough, but I appreciate the ongoing support but right now I am not sure what we will need But I do know it will be A LOT! With two little babies and the looooooooooooong road ahead that I face, know that I will be leaning on ALL of you! Plus I will be out of work for months, so any extra support will be greatly appreciated. Darren and I aren't used to asking for help, but right now is a time to lean on our loved ones that have already reached out to help. I have a dear friend that will be setting up a meal train, and if you are far away or might not be into cooking there are other options, gift cards to local markets, delivery of groceries, time with babies, shopping, cleaning, laundry, love, a shoulder to cry on, a call......You name it, and we will need it! 

I will keep you all posted on my ongoing results from my test and I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving weekend with your loved ones. 

much love to all of you -J


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